Green...
Green…
The color of grass and leaves, runny noses, leprechaun attire and, unfortunately for me, my boyfriend’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt. I should have seen a red flag go up in 10th grade when he wrote a poem during our poetry unit to honor the mean, green fighting machines that are the Ninja Turtles. Especially, when he wanted to frame it for all to see. Luckily, the framing of his ode to the turtles never happened. When he decides to show off the shirt in public, I usually try to stay a step behind. On occasion, I have asked him to change in which he retaliated by calling me Shredder. Smiles he receives from people passing by are jealous smiles according to him. Of course. Jealousy is the exact emotion they are experiencing when they gaze longingly at his TMNT shirt. Unfortunately, he doesn’t seem to be parting with it anytime soon, so it is up to me to save him from further embarrassment. It is time for the Ninja Turtles to meet their demise.
Mission: Destroy the Turtles
Possible Actions to Destroy the TMNT:
-rip it up and blame the dog
-accidently wash it with bleach (oops!)
-bury it in the backyard (outside of fence to avoid resurfacing issues due to dog
-Donate it to Goodwill
-trash day (enough said)
-hide it behind the sofa (no one ever looks there)
-toss it in the fire pit (burn, turtles, burn)
The color of grass and leaves, runny noses, leprechaun attire and, unfortunately for me, my boyfriend’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt. I should have seen a red flag go up in 10th grade when he wrote a poem during our poetry unit to honor the mean, green fighting machines that are the Ninja Turtles. Especially, when he wanted to frame it for all to see. Luckily, the framing of his ode to the turtles never happened. When he decides to show off the shirt in public, I usually try to stay a step behind. On occasion, I have asked him to change in which he retaliated by calling me Shredder. Smiles he receives from people passing by are jealous smiles according to him. Of course. Jealousy is the exact emotion they are experiencing when they gaze longingly at his TMNT shirt. Unfortunately, he doesn’t seem to be parting with it anytime soon, so it is up to me to save him from further embarrassment. It is time for the Ninja Turtles to meet their demise.
Mission: Destroy the Turtles
Possible Actions to Destroy the TMNT:
-rip it up and blame the dog
-accidently wash it with bleach (oops!)
-bury it in the backyard (outside of fence to avoid resurfacing issues due to dog
-Donate it to Goodwill
-trash day (enough said)
-hide it behind the sofa (no one ever looks there)
-toss it in the fire pit (burn, turtles, burn)
posted by ktatum at
11:46 PM
3 Comments:
Kristin, this piece is really funny. I can just imagine beyond the destruction to the funeral that would need to be held for the faithful TMNT shirt. And I guess you already know what the groom's cake will look like at the reception.
By
Donna Sewell, at 9:01 AM
I love the complete and utter disdain for your bf's beloved TMNT shirt that you do not even try to hide. Too funny. I mean, I loved the TMNT growing up. Did you not watch them??? I love Michealangelo the best... I think. However, my love for TMNT quickly gave way to another acronym - NKOTB.
My sister and I had EVERY piece of NKOTB memorabilia ever created - posters, tapes, bedding, pins, wall banners, etc. We loved them. My mom took my sister to a concert in Atlanta. I got left at home. I'm still a little bit bitter. I'm not gonna lie.
Back on topic... I think your BWP nickname needs to be Shredder for sure. : )
By
Carrie Beth, at 9:15 AM
OMG! Carrie Beth,
I had every single piece of NKOTB memorabilia, too. I can so relate to your bitterness. My mom took my sister to a concert in Atlanta, and I got left behind. Not only did I get left behind, I was stung by a wasp for the very first time.
By
ktatum, at 6:28 PM
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