trials and tribulations
Journal entry
June 19, 2006
Well as predicted, I forgot my writing journal, but technology has not failed me and I can still write. The topic is trials as in tests or tribulations. Oh, please, that is my life.
St. Theresa of Avila once said, during one of her bouts with migraine headaches, on a particularly bumpy carriage ride in 16th century Spain, “God, if this is how you treat your friend, no wonder you don’t have many.” The meaning being that the closer you grow to God, the more you will suffer. How you handle the suffering is what makes the difference between us ordinary souls and the saints. The saints had the grace to bear their sufferings well, giving glory to God for the gift and offering it up to Christ as penance for sinners.
I never came to see suffering and trials as spiritual attacks until the most difficult trial of my life…so far. That was the attack on my brother by Ashley Paulk. This is when I came face-to-face with Satan. This began the darkest time for my soul. I felt like my prayer life was dry, empty. I received comfort from nothing and struggled daily and nightly with the overpowering desire for revenge. I was alone in the desert and temptation was all around me. The only salvation was clinging to my faith. I clung to it like I was hanging from a cliff. If I allowed my grip to loosen even for a moment, the results would be catastrophic for my soul.
This led to my first trip to Lourdes on a service pilgrimage. I had nowhere else to go. As Father Corapi preaches, when the enemy is at hand, go to your Mother. So I did. I went to Our Lady of Lourdes and prayed for her intercession. Most of that week was spent in prayer, service, and penance, penance, penance. When I came back, I had peace in my heart and I knew everything would be okay with my brother.
Circumstances that followed did not seem, at least on the surface, to be okay but after I meditated for awhile, I soon realized how much worse it could have been. I thanked Mary for her intercession and continue to serve Christ through Her as thanksgiving for what could have been. I trust in God that everything has been done for a reason and that it is His will. I know that my brother has special protection from harm and that gives me peace. I just wish he would see it, but I guess that is his trial and I can’t take it for him. I pray that he is equally successful.
June 19, 2006
Well as predicted, I forgot my writing journal, but technology has not failed me and I can still write. The topic is trials as in tests or tribulations. Oh, please, that is my life.
St. Theresa of Avila once said, during one of her bouts with migraine headaches, on a particularly bumpy carriage ride in 16th century Spain, “God, if this is how you treat your friend, no wonder you don’t have many.” The meaning being that the closer you grow to God, the more you will suffer. How you handle the suffering is what makes the difference between us ordinary souls and the saints. The saints had the grace to bear their sufferings well, giving glory to God for the gift and offering it up to Christ as penance for sinners.
I never came to see suffering and trials as spiritual attacks until the most difficult trial of my life…so far. That was the attack on my brother by Ashley Paulk. This is when I came face-to-face with Satan. This began the darkest time for my soul. I felt like my prayer life was dry, empty. I received comfort from nothing and struggled daily and nightly with the overpowering desire for revenge. I was alone in the desert and temptation was all around me. The only salvation was clinging to my faith. I clung to it like I was hanging from a cliff. If I allowed my grip to loosen even for a moment, the results would be catastrophic for my soul.
This led to my first trip to Lourdes on a service pilgrimage. I had nowhere else to go. As Father Corapi preaches, when the enemy is at hand, go to your Mother. So I did. I went to Our Lady of Lourdes and prayed for her intercession. Most of that week was spent in prayer, service, and penance, penance, penance. When I came back, I had peace in my heart and I knew everything would be okay with my brother.
Circumstances that followed did not seem, at least on the surface, to be okay but after I meditated for awhile, I soon realized how much worse it could have been. I thanked Mary for her intercession and continue to serve Christ through Her as thanksgiving for what could have been. I trust in God that everything has been done for a reason and that it is His will. I know that my brother has special protection from harm and that gives me peace. I just wish he would see it, but I guess that is his trial and I can’t take it for him. I pray that he is equally successful.
posted by Buttercup at
10:49 PM
1 Comments:
I'm impressed by your faith. I have trouble seeing past the trial sometimes. Is it just me: I always feel like the only one suffering during the lowest moments.
By
Donna Sewell, at 6:37 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home