Bumper Stickers

I have never really understood bumper stickers. They're generally unattractive and often lack the humor that was intended. They pile up and peel and become an eyesore on too many older sedans. And yet these aging, yellowing sticky notes can tell you so much about complete strangers.

Riding behind a Toyota Camry, for instance, you may find that the driver voted for Bush, has an honor student for a child, is a Christian. Riding behind a similar Camry, you may find that the driver is a vegan, supports animal rights, uses green energy.

But what about people who have bought used cars? Has anyone ever been judged or discriminated against by driving around with other people's bumper stickers?

One of my favorite bumper stickers was always, "My kid beat up your honor student." My second year of college, I bought a bumper sticker that played on this idea. It said, "My cat can beat up your cat." I never put the sticker on my car, but I slid it in the front of my see-through binder. It got a few laughs, but the other sticker on my binder got me weird looks. It said, "I talk to squirrels. Chi-ku-chi-ku-chi-ku." No one found that funny, but if you know me you know why I bought it.

I was also very tempted to buy bumper stickers from the Lebowskifest website not long ago. But then I thought, what will I do with them? I'm trying to grow and rise above my pack-rat-ishness, but I'm not sure how the effort is progressing.

Now I'm just looking up bumper stickers online. Here is one that I liked:
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

And then I found some rather interesting/wavering between funny and not funny ones:
This bumper sticker exploits illiterates.
This is it. I don't have another car.
Between two evils, pick the one you can't spell.
Calm down, it's just ones and zeros.
Efficiency is a highly developed form of laziness.
Life is a collection of low-probability events.
Life is like... an analogy.
This could be the start of something average.
Humpty Dumpty was pushed.
Hit me. I need money.
All generalizations are false.

Here are the strange ones:
Chew on a sock.
Sadism means never having to say you're sorry.
Never argue with a man carrying a water buffalo.
Would you quit being evil over my shoulder?
Support mental health or I'll kill you.
So many stupid people, so few comets.

And this one just kind of sums it up for me:
I don't care who you are, what you're driving, or where you'd rather be.